That article turtleman posted really hit close to home. For close to 1-1/2 years warcraft became my life, literally.

I guess my computer addiction started different from most people. When I was 17 I hitchhiked across the U.S.A (I am Canadian). When I got to a city called Waterbury, just outside of New York, I decided to stay there for a while. I lived there for about 5 months in an abandoned factory and made frequent trips to New York. I found out after 5 months living in the same factory that it was a toxic area. There were no signs, warnings, or anything like that. I was about a 2-min walk from downtown. A cop found me sleeping their one-day and told me. Well shortly after I decided I had enough traveling and went home to Edmonton, Alberta.

6 months after I got home I had a heart attack. I went to the hospital and found out the heart attack was cause by a tumor in my chest that was roughly twice the size of my heart. It was blocking the release of the fluid in the walls around my heart and the pressure was building up. After a shitload of tests, including a biopsy in which they stuck a 9-inch needle into my chest, and a bone marrow test, I was diagnosed with cancer. Cancer that was cause by my stay at the factory.

Anyway this was several years ago and I am fine now, fully healed, but during the 6 months of my cancer treatment I was effectively bed-ridden, throwing up everything I ate and unable to do any kind of physical activity. It was not the cancer itself that made me sick, that was gone in under a month, but the chemo continued on, and that¡¯s what fucks you up.

My moms boss heard about my problem, and he bought me a state of the art computer and signed me up for a year of internet access, all paid for. I bought warcraft 2 just before I began my treatment and it soon became the only thing that kept me going. I played for roughly 16 hours a day, 7 days a week, for 6 months straight. The 5 hours every second Friday that I had to go to my treatment were torture, not because I had to sit there with an iv while they pumped these drugs in me, but because I could not play war2.

At the end of my treatment both my parents and myself were at wits end. They could not bare to see me spending so much time on my computer. I had no more social skills, I lived inside a computer game. If they ever tried to talk to me I would lash out at them. Even if they said HI I would tell them to get the hell out of my room I was busy.

I began to go crazy when I lost. I would punch holes in my walls and start screaming. I also gain 60 pounds in 6 months, bringing me up to 230. 2 days before my last treatment my dad came home one day and heard me yelling and banging when he pulled into the driveway, even with the car still running. We had a huge fight. It was pretty rough and I was bitter because I was sick and felt like they weren¡¯t understanding enough.

I decided to move out with an old friend of mine, who I hadn¡¯t seen since I got sick. I think it was the best thing I could have done. It forced me to take responsibly. 2 weeks after my final treatment, while I was still sick and weak from the months of treatments, I moved into a 2-bedroom apartment with this guy. It went well and the week after I moved in I had a new job and I felt better every day. I started going to the gym and after another 6 months I had brought myself down to a healthy 200 lbs. and was doing good. Then my roommate and I got into a huge fight and I moved out into a 1 bedroom apartment and got a new cable modem.

I spent the next 6 months steadily getting more and more into warcraft again. After 6 months I lost my job and that was it, I was hooked again. I spent another year like the 6 I spent while I had cancer, playing non-stop 16 hours a day. I used up my saving after about 3 months and was broke. I didn't gain weight this time because I had no money for food.
I started scamming companies to get money. I opened a bank account with every Canadian bank and inserted blank checks in the machine. Then I would take out as much as the machine would let me. After I did this to every bank I started pawning off everything I owned till all I had was my computer. Once I had nothing left I made fake pay stubs on my computer and went to payday loan companies and took out anywhere from 500 to 1000 as a payday loan that I never paid back. Finally I got a student grant from the government from 24,000 dollars. I spent it in about 4 months. I bought everything I could think of.

Everything I pawned off I bought again, only new. Once that money ran out I pawned all my new stuff off again, till all I had left was my computer. Then I started stealing things from stores and returning them. 200$ jackets, $200 computer books, dvd's, video games, portable CD players. Anything I could.

I could only do this once in every store though, because they put your name on record and tell you they won't refund anything again without a recite. Normally they don't do it at all, but I always made sure that there was a woman at the counter, and that she was a manager, and they she looked lonely. A little flirting and alot of smiling will work wonders. Once I ran out of stores in the city my luck was done. I had 10 phone calls a day from banks and payday loan companies looking for their money, I owed around $50,000 to different institutions, I had nothing to show for it, I slept on the floor in my apartment, and my life had fallen apart. Finally I was faced with the choice I knew was coming. Pawn of my computer for rent and get a job, or rob a bank. I almost went with the second choice.

After 1 year of doing nothing by playing on my computer, spending most of my time on warcraft, I found myself standing outside a bank with a note in my pocket saying that I had a gun and to give me money. That¡¯s all it takes these days to rob a bank, at least where I am from. There is a zero resistance policy in effect. When you get caught though, it is treated as armed robbery.

So there I was standing outside a bank trying to convince myself to go in their a rob it. How does a person get to that point? I hear all kinds of stories. People doing it for their family, for drugs, because they had a bad childhood and have no education, but I have never in my life heard of someone doing it cause of a computer. I had a good childhood, great parents, and the experience to get a job after five minutes of looking. And there I was ready to rob a bank.

All kinds of shit went flashing though my head then. Like I was watching my life flash before my eyes. I saw had I had become. An hour later I was at a pawnshop with my computer. An hour after that I had my rent paid, 6 days late. 2 days later I had started a new job working as a full-time laborer at a cabinet making shop during the evening from 5p.m to 1a.m and I was enrolled in a computer science class that started in April of this year.

I am now getting by with an average of 98.2% in my CS class and am working on my second year of apprenticeship as a cabinet maker. I have played a few games since then, I played about 9 games a month and a half ago, and played 3 more this Monday. One day when I have more time I would like to be able to play more often, but I know now how easy it is to get caught up in the game.
For the rest of my life I will have to deal with the fact that I can never fully enjoy a computer game again, and that I will always have to regulate the time spent on the computer.

Last edited by $hazm on Fri Jan 17, 2014 12:36 pm; edited 1 time in total

good luck to ya man, and hope to see you back on bnet soon =p


~face

Uhhhh...I don't really know what to say. That story is really pushing the limits of believability, but I also don't think anyone would take the time to make up a story like that. Why haven't I heard this before? About your hitchhiking trip + cancer + chemo?

Anyways, best of luck with life. You still live in Edmonton? My cousin moved out to Bc and opened his own wood working place (cabinets etc). It's doing really well and he's gone from the only employee, to about 15.

quote:

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Originally posted by Axolotl:
Uhhhh...I don't really know what to say. That story is really pushing the limits of believability, but I also don't think anyone would take the time to make up a story like that. Why haven't I heard this before? About your hitchhiking trip + cancer + chemo?

Anyways, best of luck with life. You still live in Edmonton? My cousin moved out to Bc and opened his own wood working place (cabinets etc). It's doing really well and he's gone from the only employee, to about 15.

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It is not somthing I like to talk about. I generally keep it to myself. I am not really sure why I decided to share it today, I just felt I had to after hearing about the guy who killed himself. I felt like I had sunk down to that level myself.

The only person who I have ever told about my having cancer is Konmon, who was my #1 ally on warcraft while I had cancer, and I told him at the time I had it. Other than that I don't think that anyone knew. As to the other stuff... I was ashamed, wouldn't you be?

quote:

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Originally posted by Sex@Nizzos:
He was busy being bed ridden and making girls have orgasms at the library! duh~

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$hazm, I don't doubt your truthfulness but I agree with Axolotl, that story is so close to being impossible that I had to read it 3x before I could actually see the reality in it. I can relate in some way because when I started playing War2 I was so addicted I gained 45 lbs. and I was easily tempered after I would lose a game. This has changed since I quit.

As for the person who stole my name off this message board, I am not "Nobody." from b.net. I haven't played Warcraft in over 9 months. And my old name was Stoned_Peon.

I am on right now if you want a game face

Glad you are better, $hazm. I'll be sure to limit you to 3 games a day and you better not smurf

The Life of a hacker...

My story:

Mom kicks me out of house and sends me to live with family in Indiana. My uncle plays Warcraft the original. I like it, so I buy the second one. I come back to California and play it. The end.

I have no idea who you are $hazm, but I'm glad to see you are doing better. You're story is a little hard to believe, but I think that anyone who would just take the time to make something like that up is a complete loser, and I don't think anyone would do that. I hope you have a great life, and good luck with everything.

quote:

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Originally posted by Wh@T:
I have no idea who you are $hazm, but I'm glad to see you are doing better. You're story is a little hard to believe, but I think that anyone who would just take the time to make something like that up is a complete loser, and I don't think anyone would do that. I hope you have a great life, and good luck with everything.

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I got a new webcam today =-)

Last edited by $hazm on Fri Jan 17, 2014 12:42 pm; edited 1 time in total

Good Work not having the courage to post your real name "pathetic".

Allow me to quote:

"To Err is Human; To Forgive is Divine"

People go to extremes for all sorts of reasons, why is it so hard to believe $hazm did it?

wow that was gay

Last edited by $hazm on Fri Jan 17, 2014 12:42 pm; edited 1 time in total

grrrr

ok fuck it, anyone who wants to see go to

Last edited by $hazm on Fri Jan 17, 2014 12:43 pm; edited 1 time in total

One more thing. Ash once you have gone through what I have and beat third stage lymphoma then come talk to me about how fucked up I am.

Bah now I am getting pissed http://www.angelfire.com/nt2/jonspictures/Jon.jpg

Try that the other one is being gay.

You can't link files directly from geocities. E-mail me the file and i'll put it up for ya, and give u the address. My email is epberlin@mail.com

-SaBiQ

I am sure if you are reading this forum you are/were addicted to warcraft whether you admit it or not. Being addicted to warcraft isnt bad if you do other things than warcraft. And if you do things other than warcraft you wont be(as)addicted. get the picture?

Its funny, one of my best friends is from Waterbury, and he always tells me how fucked up it is. It seems like every few months I come across another story about Waterbury that is even more amazing than the next one. Anyway, I'm glad you're on the right track now. You've got one hell of a story for your grandkids...

you can add me to the "Thrown out of house because of war2" group.

My dad and mom are divorced, and for the longest time my dad had the only computer. So i could only play war2 on weekends for like 2 yrs, well u can imagine how anctous i was every friday. So one week my mom tells me I have to stay with her for Easter. I complete flip out and start punching doors and throwing shit, breaking shit, so she tells my dad i have to move in with him. The things we do for war2......

whoever posted as pathetic is pathetic. what kind of a fucking asshole would flame $hazm after he was willing to share his life story with you guys. hacking isn't even that big of a deal to the community anymore, it's the shit talkers and flamers that are getting fucking annoying. i mean come on, 3/4 of the guys who talk shit on here weigh under 140lbs, wear glasses, and attend star trek conventions. FUCK YOU. whatever happened to this just being a game for fun? instead it's become an ego fest where egos greatly exceed skills. so for all the fag flamers, stop being so goddamn hostile, stfu, and enjoy the fucking game.

Shit happens in life. I know people who have had incredibly bad lives, but they came out great. People also make mistakes. If they are sorry for it, then they should be forgiven. And everyone deserves to have a great life, no matter what shit they pull, as long as they are sorry for it. If you can't forgive someone, especially online, I think you have gone through some tough things and are deciding to be incredibly hostile online to seem "tough" or some shit. I don't know. But just grow up.

Amazing story, $hazm. As for me, I've played unbelievable amounts of the game, but it never kept me from my homework or job anymore than I would have kept myself from it with some other form of procrastination.

Hello Shazm,

We're glad you're ok now. What you did here takes a lot of courage and I commend you for it.

The fact that you're still here and survived cancer means a lot. You've got a purpose in life bro, maybe you know about it now or not but sharing it to others as a lesson is definitely one of those.

When great crisis comes to us, only two things can happen: either you break or become stronger. There cannot be a middle ground.

A similar crisis occurred to me (spinal cord accident), and I thought I was strong-willed before but I almost broke and I realized then how weak I can become because of pride. Pride of over-relying on one's own self, on my own strength. Sadly, society may be to blame for this. They always stress self-reliance and value independence, but forget about teaching humility and praying.

I had forgotten about praying, that I needed God more. Only when I admitted this (after a long time of denial), did I cry and realized true strength comes from God and every strength I had came from him anyway.

God has given you a second, maybe even a third chance (almost a bank robbery) at life. Use it wisely this time around.

That's all bro....

GOD Bless,

Alex

"I rejoice in my weakness because to God I am closest"

one must ro0fle at banflameass

Alex C, kindly shut the fuck up with your religious bullshit. Thanks!